• thenicolekay

Does Your Phone Love You Back?

Technology has the opportunity to bring great benefits to today’s society. With that said, it can also taint communities, families and relationships. Just recently I took to social media to share some new rules and efforts that I am applying to our new home. If we were truly taking a fresh start with this new life, it’s the perfect opportunity to inhabit some stronger, back to the core, values.


A couple weeks ago I watched a series by Diane Sawyer called “Screentime”. This series documented how technology has changed our society, our relationships and our general way of life. As I listened intently, one thing stood out the most; I realized that my own family had been affected by technology and on many different levels. As I looked back and evaluated my life with my loved ones, I came to the following conclusions. First, I shamefully admit that I, myself, was spending more time staring at my phone than utilizing that free time with my own children and my significant other. Eating dinner was spent in front of the television with no conversation. I also often found myself picking up the laptop or answering my work emails even when I knew it was something that could wait.




This definitely was not the way I was raised. Listen, I get it is so easy to say, being in my generation, technology was very little. The closest thing would be a clear landline phone that lit up when it rang and the brand new Nintendo that debuted in the late 80s. Even with those two things, I spent most my time with my friends, outside, away from screens of every sort. I had meaningful meals with my Grandmother and Mother. There was no such thing as text messaging unless you want to call 43770 on the pager a text. Today’s Apple Watch was only a cool futuristic watch that George Jetson wore (I hope you’re singing the song in your head now). One thing was certain in those years, relationships were put as a priority over everything else.


As I am embracing and holding on so tightly to these last few years I have with my children, I want to make sure that these years are not wasted. As I dig deeper into my relationship with my significant other, it’s important that we spend time on each other without distractions. Your family is important enough. There is a great quote that I put on Facebook today.

“If you died tonight, your employer would have a job advert to fill your role by the end of the month. But your friends and family would miss you forever. Don’t get so busy on making a living that you forget to work on making a life.” ~ Unknown

I’m not saying that I’m throwing all technology out of the window. I am saying that I have put large restrictions to the time that I’m spent on it. I’ve done the same for my children. There is nothing more important in this lifetime than to surround ourselves with the people we love and love us in return. It’s time to install in the next generation what love, life, family and values really mean. If we as parents are not the ones guiding our children to the bright light that life can be, then what are we here for? As we are carrying on our parents’ legacy, let our own legacy not be of a remembrance of technology.


I challenge each one of you reading this. Next time your loved one is trying to grab your attention while you are glaring into your phone, put it down. Next time you go to share a meal with your spouse, listen to the words spoken intently. Next time your child asks you to play when you are busy working from home in the evening, take a break and relish in those moments. One day, those moments could be stripped from you.


Life is to precious. Life is to short. Let us live our lives connecting with others, caring for others and sharing love and laughter with one another.


I wish you all a wonderful and beautiful week.

With Love ~ Nicole

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